Today I read a post for someone that tells of a deaf blind young man, who was so all his 20 years, when he regained his sight was the first thing he saw a dog, because he did not know what he looked like, he had never looked in a mirror before, he thought that this dog was a human, but he might be slightly different from him, until he saw a human. He knew then that this being he saw, which still doesn't know what it is, is not human, is not like him
We don't know the thing until we feel the truth, or the opposite of it. You may still think that you love someone until someone comes to feel the truth about what love is. You will not know the meaning of friendship until you believe the person who supports you in your heart before your joy and is the best help for you. You'll still think that your feelings are real, that you are getting what you deserve, and that this scenario is the best, truest and highest established, until what transforms your convictions and corrects your thoughts
So what I feel right now is not love, my heartbeat that dances until those around me hear it when I see it is not love, and the redness of my face if they happen to me is not real?
I think I will not know the answer to this question for sure until I feel this called love, I don't even know how to describe it, we tell what we have experienced, or we imagine what we would feel if we ever experienced, and I have no perception of this.. It's the same idea that our writer friend talked about, my mind can't understand that there is something more impacting my feelings than I'm told right now, I can't describe it.
This idea is probably my darkest and painful idea so far.. The idea that a person does not know that there is something more beautiful, truthful or stronger than he has.. The idea that I might die and never felt this kind of love before, love that doesn't matter how much I thought I loved before, or how much I loved after it, will still be the top of my measure of feelings, which I measure the rest based on what I felt at the time.. The idea that one of us might live his entire life and she doesn't know how to describe a feeling, because he didn't experience it.
I don't know, but what I do know is that I want to leave myself unleashed to experience all of them, love, friendship, motherhood, happiness and success, I also want to experience defeat, weakness, despair and helplessness, maybe not helplessness I've had before, an experience that I don't want to restore again. My point is that I would like to experience all the feelings, sweet and bitter.. This will help me write about her and describe it, this will help me figure out what I like and what I hate, this will help me taste the feeling and its opposite, this will help me to live
It's the same idea that we grew up, you won't feel the taste of candy if it's all you eat, you won't know why people wish success and you who never failed, and you will not appreciate your yes as long as you have never been told before. God bless us the sweetness of success after failure, arriving after stumbling, and taste sugar after salt.. God bust us the sweetness of feelings, as blind has just regained his eyesight.
Good luck. I'll see you at the top.
